Your presence sends the message that homework is important business, not to be taken lightly. Maybe he has a school planner with all his homework listed, or a printout from school, or perhaps his work is listed on the classroom website. Many children attend an afterschool program where, in theory, they are doing homework. Writing down what she has finished will give her a sense of satisfaction. Identifying what she still needs to do will help her to focus on the remaining assignments.
Over time, this practice will help your child build an understanding that large tasks are completed incrementally. Encourage him to explain his thinking. Discuss the first task of the night together. Challenge your child to estimate how long the first assignment will take. Even questions are verboten while the timer runs.
The goal here is to enable the child to solve problems independently, through concentration. This not only builds concentration powers, it builds creativity, critical thinking, resilience, and resourcefulness. In my experience, the theatricality of being timed helps relax children who would otherwise feel daunted by a mountain of homework.
As each piece of work gets done, parents can add meaningful positive reinforcement. And done well! Widen Layout: standard Helping the Homework Resisters Have children do their work at a communal table. Stay nearby, to alleviate the loneliness that some kids feel — and to prevent procrastination. Ask your child to unload her backpack and talk through assignments.
Instead, focus on what helps his behavior improve. Your child might forget to do his homework, do his homework but not hand it in, do it sloppily or carelessly, or not study properly for his test. These are just a few ways that kids try to hold onto the little control they have.
When this starts happening, parents feel more and more out of control, so they punish, nag, threaten, argue, throw up their hands or over-function for their kids by doing the work for them. Now the battle is in full swing: reactivity is heightened as anxiety is elevated—and homework gets lost in the shuffle.
The hard truth for parents is that you cannot make your children do anything, let alone homework. But what you can do is to set limits, respect their individual choices, and help motivate them to motivate themselves. Keep reading for some concrete tips to help you guide them in their work without having to nag, threaten, or fight with them. Stop the Nightly Fights The way you can stop fighting with your kids over homework every night is to stop fighting with them tonight.
Disengage from the dance. Choose some different steps or decide not to dance at all. Let homework stay where it belongs—between the teacher and the student. Stay focused on your job, which is to help your child do his job. Take a Break If you feel yourself getting reactive or frustrated, take a break from helping your child with homework.
Your blood pressure on the rise is a no-win for everyone. Take five or ten minutes to calm down, and let your child do the same if you feel a storm brewing. Homework is done in a public area of your house. If grades are failing or falling, take away screen time so your child can focus and have more time to concentrate on his work.
Homework comes first. Model your own persistence and perseverance to your child. Let Your Child Make His Own Choices I recommend that within the parameters you set around schoolwork, your child is free to make his own choices. You need to back off a bit as a parent. If you take too much control over the situation, it will backfire on you by turning into a power struggle.
Within the structure you set up, your child has some choices. He can choose to do his homework or not. And he can choose to do it well and with effort or not. Show honest concern and try not to show disappointment. For example, the new rules might be that homework must be done in a public place in your home until he gets his grades back up.If the school allows devices in the classroom, taking a picture of the homework board can help students who have a hard time using a physical agenda. Over time, this practice will help your child build an understanding that large tasks are completed incrementally. When Kids Struggle With Homework Consistent complaints about homework or ongoing struggles with assignments could indicate a problem.
You also can ask to be kept in the loop about quizzes, tests, and projects.
Disengage from the dance. If there are continuing problems with homework, get help. Apply school to the "real world.
And within that structure, you expect your child to do what he has to do to be a good student. Use available tools Many schools have a homework diary or daybook for parents to sign each day, so show your interest, commitment and respect for your child by signing it regularly.
If there is a learning disability, your child may need more help.
Resist the urge, however, to offer rewards or bribes, says Lapointe. Create a work schedule for the night if necessary — and take time for a minute break every hour, if possible. Within the structure you set up, your child has some choices.
Don't miss parent-teacher conferences and maintain an ongoing dialogue. Be in touch with teachers. If he is having a difficult time doing the work or is performing below grade level expectations, he should be tested to rule out any learning disabilities or other concerns.
Learn more. Keep reading for some concrete tips to help you guide them in their work without having to nag, threaten, or fight with them. Parents might even learn a thing or two! Let Your Child Make His Own Choices I recommend that within the parameters you set around schoolwork, your child is free to make his own choices.
You and your child might meet with the teacher to discuss disciplinary actions should his grades continue to drop. Now the battle is in full swing: reactivity is heightened as anxiety is elevated—and homework gets lost in the shuffle. Make sure kids have a well-lit place to complete homework. This comes from schools emphasizing that homework is a child's responsibility, not the parents'. This not only builds concentration powers, it builds creativity, critical thinking, resilience, and resourcefulness.
Digital calendars, where parents and kids can sync reminders, can also be invaluable.